Thursday, September 23, 2010

*Popcorn Portland 2*

Since it's raining out, and that has hampered my freedom riding for the day, I decided to shower you (pun intended) with some more cool facts about my city of residence.

*  Portland pays people to stand on street corners and talk to you about saving the rain forests.  ( I considered getting a job with them, but I think the minimum qualifications for an applicant were that you either had to live in a tree for approximately one year or have done a 6 month stint on the Steve Irwin.)

* ---disclaimer: this popcorned fact involves a rant---  Everywhere you go there are these college kids wearing "VOTE NOW!" tshirts...  they carry clipboards and the burning desire to see every man, woman, and child pushing 18 sign up on their sheets to become a registered voter.  Now, I'm all for voting, but the thing is... I just learned that there are NO voting polls here in Oregon.  NONE.  (Elizabeth, you'd be out of a random job).   Here is what they do: they mail you your voting card, you fill it out, and then pop it back in the mail.  Huh?  For a land that is so gung-ho about involvement and activism, this just seems a bit complacent to me.
I could think of a trillion and one ways to invalidate this system.  here's a few i throw out just for fun:  hmmm, how about taking your die hard Democratic neighbor's registration card out of the mailbox while she's at work and shredding it???  or, perhaps you're a mischievous 15 year old, and you just get the urge to forge your mom's signature once again... only this time, you wouldn't be fooling just your principal, but Uncle Sam himself? Cool, right?  Or I know, you are an anarchist mailman who believes it's his duty to "misplace" a few of these voters' cards en route to the post office... or perhaps you feel the need to overstate how many eligible voters actually live at your address...  i mean, come on, isn't this a bit shady??
For those of you who go out and faithfully vote--- wouldn't you miss heading out to the polls on that certain Tuesday, fighting the crowds, tripping over lawn signs and ignoring the volunteers who are stuffing your pockets with pamphlets and sticking your lapels with those oversized pins?  I mean, it's sorta like giving blood.  Yes, the deed is virtuous in and of itself, but man, that sticker that says "Be nice to me; I gave blood", or those free oj's and pretzels in the back... I mean, doesn't that solidify the experience for you?  I seriously hear little trumpets in my head and the national anthem playing when I head to the polls.  There is a surge of patriotism i feel when I have to hand over my picture ID, sign my name, and then head behind that curtain.  It's similar to the power the Wizard of Oz must have felt-- pushing buttons and levers behind a curtain to determine the fate of a city or a country.  And now Oregon wants me to treat this great privilege like another piece of junk mail or a Netflix envelope to reseal and resend?  I just don't get that at all.

* They have a little place here called "Ground Control" where you can eat, drink, and listen to live music, all while you are playing old school arcade games for just a quarter a piece!  Bring on the Q*bert and the Pinball!

* There are these really great water fountains all over the city with everflowing streams.  no pushing, no breaking handles... just bubbling, cold water.  I seriously get reminded of John 4:14..."... the water I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life."  It's a cool thought, eh?

Last one for today...
*Mass transit drivers sure do love each other out here.  Every time a bus passes a trolley, or a train intersects a bus's pass, windows are rolled down or pushed out or folded open, and the drivers' hands are giving a friendly wave.  One bus I was on kept side by side with another bus on our journey up 5th Ave.  We'd pass, he'd wave, they'd pass, she waved.  But this went a bit further.  At red lights, he would crank open the double doors, and she would pop out her side window and we customers would be treated to a front row seat of the flirtatious drama "Love at the Light".  Another time, I saw a bus driver actually come on to our bus during a red light so he could hug our previously surly driver and give her a quick peck on the cheek.  boy, was she all smiles after that!

2 comments:

  1. maybe when darla and erin are done with the ranch they can move to portland and live with you save the rainforest (being in montana is practically like living in a tree right???)

    I'm scared to give blood...can i come visit you in portland and you take me to give blood? brianna wouldn't go with me here :(

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  2. I just bought my mom Ms.PacMan & Galaga!


    So editorial!
    "It's similar to the power the Wizard of Oz must have felt-- pushing buttons and levers behind a curtain to determine the fate of a city or a country. And now Oregon wants me to treat this great privilege like another piece of junk mail or a Netflix envelope to reseal and resend?"

    You could be paid for this one...loved it!

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